6/18 - 6/21 20 hour weekend (part 1)

Let's start with Thursday and Friday nights because they were a heck of a lot shorter than Saturday. I almost didn't get to clock in on Thursday but Malibu Ken made up for the delay by doing a hilarious booty dance for me. My best delivery went to a lady who still had a yard sign up that said "Yard of the Month - September 2007" up. I think it's about time for her to get over that accomplishment. Don't get me wrong, she had a nice lawn, but why show your lawn-insecurity by dwelling on how sexy your lawn was in the past?

Saturday was a long, long day. First, I was working with ArmyCook. He tends to talk and talk and talk and talk about the most inane topics. At one point we were really busy and I was working the cut station and he comes over to tell me something and I literally turn to him and say, "That's really fascinating, I'd love to chat more about it, but if I do pizzas are going to fall on the fucking floor."

Next up were the staffing problems which all stem from one fact: If El Jefe isn't working, he doesn't give a shit about staffing. So I ended up scheduled for an 11 hour shift, MonkeyWrench was scheduled to work as a driver and then work closing manager, El Jefe told Gelwyn she could go home at 7, potentially leaving Whiner and Eyebrows as the only drivers after 8:30. We were busy and MonkeyWrench ended up crying, so I took deliveries until I needed gas too much to keep taking deliveries. On my next to last delivery (a quad), my one stiffer ended up calling MonkeyWrench and bitching her out (and refusing to allow MonkeyWrench to fix the situation) and said, "I'll have your job" and finally MonkeyWrench replied, "You can have it. I don't want it." Which leads us to...

Sunday, where MonkeyWrench came in (as a driver) newly medicated. Valium + opiate painkillers + weed + (the promise of a bottle of Crown after work) = one dopey MonkeyWrench. We were once again understaffed because two boppers called in and one no-call-no-showed leaving Bambi all by herself (tangent -> I swear that girl goes through a stick of eyeliner a week). ArmyCook had to train her on make-line. Hilarity ensued.

Catch Part 2 later for Amusing vs. Not Amusing, Stats, and Pictures