Monday, December 29

12/29 Eyebrows has a Ladyfriend

It was a crazy busy Monday! I delivered to a house on an unmarked dirt road with no house numbers which was an adventure especially since my car is not designed for off-roading. I also delivered to a house whose burglar warning system consisted of a sign next to the door that said, "We don't call 911!" and had a gun (I don't know if it was a toy or not) hanging from it. For all of you not in Texas, we have a shoot-first-ask-questions-later law about shooting intruders, or intruders at your neighbor's house, or strangers on your property.

Meanwhile back at the store:
There has been this quasi-mongoloid chick hanging out at the store for the last couple of days. Before anyone gets offended by my description I will preface by saying that I don't mean this in a demeaning way but simply as a descriptor of both her physical appearance and her behavior. I first noticed her Saturday after my shift when I came to pick up my cheesesticks and I was waiting in the lobby and she was sitting there eating a burger. I thought, "Why eat a burger in the middle of a pizza place?" And then she started talking to me about where she got the burger and I was racking my brain to figure out if I knew her and why she was talking to me. She was there again tonight and I finally asked who she was and it turns out that she is Eyebrows' girlfriend. It still doesn't entirely explain why she's hanging out all the time, but God bless her for taking him off the market. As weird as she is and as much as I avoid being up front where she might talk to me about random shit, she is doing a service to humanity and for that I will tolerate her.

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